Get a Life...... Pastor

Do you remember the phrase "get a life"? 

In high school, people would use this phrase in response to someone with a lame social calendar. Or it would be a way of getting someone to stop being so boring and do something more interesting. I have heard so many reports of burnout pastors during COVID-19. I believe this simple, three-word phrase could really help those who want to remain emotionally, relationally, and spiritually healthy in ministry.

This blog has been a long time coming. I have hesitated to write for fear that it could come off the wrong way but it is essential information to those who are just starting out and need a little guidance. In speaking to so many pastors, I've realized that somehow, no one trained us how to have a life outside of ministry. By no means do I believe that I have gotten it right all the time, but you don't get to twenty-nine years of ministry without making some adjustments.

In a nutshell, Pastors must have a life outside of ministry to remain refreshed, balanced, and healthy. I do not believe that most people understand it and certainly, most pastors don't understand it. I remember attending a pastors meeting and the moderator asked pastors the question? "What do you do for fun?" The room became deafly silent. After a few moments, the guys began to provide very lame answers that were generated to satisfy the audience. A large portion of the group spit out answers like, "I read" or "I study theology". I sat there and thought.... get a life!!

Here are three things to take into account to "get a life."

1. Quit following everyone else's cool. Ministry people can often get caught up in the "monkey see monkey do life". It's the "cool pastors do cool things so I better be cool by doing the cool things he does" mentality. Have you ever seen a post on social media with a stack of books, with the sub-title reading something like... vacation picks or can't wait to dig into these!! I am not knocking those that read - in fact I do my fair share. The point is to be yourself! Don't look to others to determine what you do in your leisure.

2. Find a hobby that you can totally immerse yourself in. One thing that I have learned through the years is that you have to find times in your weeks that you are totally off. By that, I mean clearing your head and immersing yourself in something other than work and problems. Days off are only as valuable as you make them. If a day off is filled with thinking about church stuff at home then you successfully have ruined your day off. I have found places and spaces where I can go to escape "the bubble". My happy place is racing a dirt modified on Friday nights. For you, it may be running, hiking, biking, fishing, or hunting. The key is finding something you can totally immerse your mind into and empty your mind of all the ministry stuff.

3. Look for something that satisfies a gap that the ministry might not provide. Lots of pastors are competitive by nature. Ministry is no place for competition yet many fall prey to it. I know some pastors who compete as runners, others play basketball, pickleball, and golf. These activities keep competition in the correct silo. Others fish and hunt which satisfies the warrior/provider drive that's within many of us. I now pastors that are super creative. One of my friends is a woodcarver. He satisfies his drive to be creative through designing beautiful wood carvings. 

It is super easy to let ministry take over your life. When a person gets to that spot - they are dangerously close to burning out. Unfortunately, I have met way too many pastors who gain their identity through ministry. It is difficult for them not to talk about church growth, ministry initiatives, or present pastoral trends in every conversation. To those people I say, in 2022, it might be time to get a life. 

United States Civil Rights Trail

Do your homework! I have one objective in writing this post. I desire to inspire the motivated to do the hard work of understanding black history in the United States. Lisa and I recently took a week to spend time touring museums and monuments in the south to gain a better understanding of the path of black citizens through our nation's history. I believe that you will be enlightened and moved by the sacrifices that have been paid for the same rights the whites have had all along. 

The declaration of Independence preamble clearly presents the concept that all men are created equal.  The Bible teaches that God loves all and Jesus died for all. We have equal footing before God and as US citizens. The picture above is of Lisa and I standing at the Edmund Pettus Bridge in Selma, Alabama. This was the sight where hundreds were denied the right to simply protest their right to vote. You can go to the National Voting Rights Museum and Institute right at the foot of the bridge in Selma.

Our journey continued in Mongomery, Alabama where we visited the Legacy Museum. This museum presented the injustices of blacks from the boats of Africa to the modern incarceration of black men and women. It also captured the vast amount of black men who were lynched. Just down the street, you can visit The National Memorial for Peace and Justice. It is sobering to see the thousands of men who were killed because of the color of their skin. It is a hard pill to swallow. When you read what each man was accused of, it sickens me that no one was ever prosecuted for these murders. 

We moved on to the Rosa Parks Museum in downtown Mongomery next. It is amazing the resolve and unity the black citizens had once she was confronted on the bus in late December of 1956. The collective community did not step foot on a public bus for three hundred and eighty-one days. They walked, carpooled, and started their own cab infrastructure. I am amazed how many of the people in the leadership of this movement were pastors. Most people do not know that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr was Rosa Park's pastor for a time. You can visit the Dexter Avenue King Memorial Baptist Church and the Holt Street Baptist Church where the masses were inspired to stand for their rights.

We moved north to Memphis on our journey. For me, a highlight was the National Civil Rights Museum at the Lorraine Motel. The exhibits are a comprehensive look at the history of the civil rights movement in the United States from the 17th century until today. It is sobering to review our history where a primary leader of the civil rights movement was gunned down. If you have to make a choice of where you must go, this would be my vote. 

I gained so much knowledge and understanding of history on this trip. You can learn more by visiting civilrightstrail.com. 

I thought I would leave you with the definition of critical race theory being that I have had no one who could define it for me yet. I am not going to weigh in at this point.

critical race theory (CRT), intellectual movement, and loosely organized framework of legal analysis based on the premise that race is not a natural, biologically grounded feature of physically distinct subgroups of human beings but a socially constructed (culturally invented) category that is used to oppress and exploit people of color. Critical race theorists hold that the law and legal institutions in the United States are inherently racist insofar as they function to create and maintain social, economic, and political inequalities between whites and nonwhites, especially African Americans.  Written by The Editors of Encyclopaedia Britannica

Fathers - Learn, Grow, Change

Our family usually celebrates Fathers Day altogether. We gather at one of the sibling's houses and have a carry-in meal. This year Jenny, my younger sister invited us to her home.  As I walked in, I immediately noticed my dad. He was wearing shorts (the usual) and a "Celtic Green" pair of Converse low-top tennis shoes. For many people, seeing a seventy-eight-year-old wearing bright green tennis shoes would be strange and shocking. For me, it is something that I have grown to expect and appreciate greatly.

My dad has taught me many things throughout my life. I would not have the work ethic nor the drive to learn, grow and change without his influence. He has been a never-ending inspiration to me. I have watched him through the seasons of his life. I have learned so much. This blog is an attempt to capture three areas of life that will help you no matter what season you are in as a father. 

My mom passed away a few years ago. At that time, we decided to have my dad come live with us to assist him through a knee replacement. I observed my dad change right before my eyes. God was doing a work in him that I would like to share. My dad has always been a learner. From my earliest memories, he was reading, designing, building, and using new applications. I am sure you have heard the phrase, "jack of all trades, master of none." If you looked this up in the encyclopedia, you might find my dad's photo there. As a father, one of the best gifts you can give your children is a desire to learn. His never-ending thrust for knowledge is refreshing. Most people lose that desire before they hit fifty.

The second area that I have learned from my dad is the importance of growing as a person. This is much different than being a learner. Growth goes to the core of who we are. Most people I know recognize that they have weaknesses. Over time they become comfortable with those voids and never try to achieve growth in their negative characteristics and traits. Watching my dad grow is amazing. 

Growth is the process of becoming someone different. I think people who grow have to be willing to take risks. People are creatures of habit and uncomfortable to change. New ways of thinking and behaving do not happen naturally. Growth happens when people seek, experience, and know God. It has been inspiring to see God work in my dad's heart and to see him grow as a result of that. For every dad reading this blog, embrace your relationship with God, and watch growth take place.

The is one last area I want to talk about, change. Change requires humility. Change means work. Change means uncertainty. I have watched my dad change. There is no way that I would have seen my dad in green tennis shoes ten years ago. His early years as a believer were spent in a very conservative legalistic environment. He has surrendered to God changing him and not the opinions of men. Change occurs when we begin to understand that God knows what He is doing and when we grasp onto who He is shaping us to be. 

Fathers, remember that one of the greatest gifts you can give your children is being a man who learns, grows, and changes.

Bass Lessons

30 bass in less than 3 hours. Sound like fun? or more like a summer dream? It became a reality for a friend and me. Recently, I was able to join up with a long-time friend and outdoor writer Mike Roux for an evening on an Illinois private lake. 

Mike texted me on a whim to ask me if I was up for an evening fishing trip the next day. I quickly texted back, "Yes, absolutely!" He picked me up around six, and we headed toward a private lake that we had fished in past. 

The plan was to fish til dark. Our usual route was to troll the lake in a clockwise fashion. Mike and I usually create a little competition to add a little spice to our outings. This night I decided that we would compete for the first fish, the biggest fish, and the most fish. What I didn't know at the time is that we would have a hard time keeping track of all the fish! 

This evening was a classic example of how the fishing dynamics change over the course of a couple hours. We carried three poles with three different lures to meet the challenges we might face throughout the evening. It was only a couple casts before we caught our first fish using a crankbait. For the next half hour, we both caught a half dozen fish. 

As we moved into a bit of shade from the saplings lining the water's edge, we began to use a wacky worm against the bank. Mike caught his first three-pound bass of the night. He put me on to Stike King's "Sweet Tater Pie" a couple of years ago and it did not disappoint once again. Over the next forty-five minutes, we caught another half dozen bass. They ranged in size but all were in the pound to two-pound range. We both had caught seven basses apiece when the evening began to get interesting as the sun began to set.

Mike decided first to switch to a topwater spinner bait. His go-to is a Moto lure that he has caught some monsters with. I was still working the wacky worm with not a lot of success when it happened. Mike got blown up by a nice three-and-a-half-pounder. Then another bass and then another. It was every cast for the next forty-five minutes. The bass were so active that we were losing track of how many we had caught individually and together. We both decided that we would stop at thirty, simply because we were not equipped to fish in the dark. It did not take very long to hit thirty. With one last cast, I pulled in a three-pounder and we called a fantastic evening! 

The takeaway is to fish changes that are occurring throughout the fishing trip. In this case, we were fishing for bass. We went from a crankbait to the wacky worm. When they stop hitting the worm, we moved to a spinnerbait on the top. This proved to be the correct formula on this summer night.

Not My Day

When was the last time you stared down death? For the first time in my life, I didn't know if it would be my last Sunday. I have served in the capacity of a supporter during others' brush with death countless times. But it was different this time, it was me. A person's faith and beliefs come into clear focus in moments like these. 

After a Saturday of celebrating Lisa and I's thirty-sixth year of being together, we returned home from an evening out. I began to feel more uncomfortable as the night went on. After a few hours of restlessness, I decided to go to the emergency room just for peace of mind. Once I made it into a doctor's care, tests were run. The electrocardiogram showed that I was having a heart attack. Even though I was not experiencing any of the classic symptoms, I was headed to the cardiac cath lab. 

I talked to the cardiologist the entire way through my procedure. He discovered that I had a major blockage and was able to put a stint in. I was back in recovery in less than an hour. For the next several hours, I was left to myself for the most part. Lisa could not visit until eight on Sunday evening. I had a lot of time to sit in my hospital bed to think. 

Here are three things that became crystal clear on that Sunday. 

1.  Number your days 

The Bible tells us to teach us to number our days in Psalm 90:12. We all think that we have a lifetime left to live, to fulfill our dreams and spend time with the ones we love. Living life with the end in mind is a good idea. I asked the question to myself, "Is this the life you should be living?" What should you be doing differently and do you have your priorities aligned correctly?  

2. Live life for God, not yourself

When you are facing your potential end, it is common to do some serious life evaluation and soul searching. The second reality for me is this: life is much more meaningful being lived for God than living for yourself.  Matthew 6:33 says, But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be provided to you. I have concluded that I am doing the things that God created me to do and with the people, He has placed beside me.  Pastoring a church and coaching young people is something that I was born to do. I am incredibly grateful that I still am able to fulfill my life purpose and that God is giving me more time to impact others for Him.

3. Leave no unfinished business.

When the Cardiologist announced that I was having a heart attack, I immediately thought about my people. I was prompted in my spirit to answer this question, Do I have any unfinished business? Is there anything I need to say? I have thought about this a lot and still up to this present moment, all my relationships are up to date. I have regrets and lapses in judgment over my life but I have come to resolve them with God and others. The Bible says in James 5:16, "Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed."

We have no promise of tomorrow. We get today, so number your days., live life for God and not yourself, and leave no unfinished business.

What would God know about rental cars?

 

My wife and I  decided to add a few days of vacation to a wedding ceremony that I was to perform in the first week of January. We were able to do all the booking and reservations before we left. The only thing that was not arranged was our ground transportation. This did not concern either one of us because it is easy to pick up rentals cars at arrival when flying. 

We had plans to rent a car at the airport and take a couple days to drive down to Key West from Orlando. Upon arrival, we navigated our way to the rental car area. We soon learned that there was not a car available at any of the rental companies. It was December 30th, the craziest week of the year in Orlando. With a quick decision, we decided to catch an Uber, get to the hotel, and regroup in the morning.

Lisa woke up before me, attempting to find a rental via her phone. She had no luck at all; I even overheard her trying to rent a U-haul truck. (I am not lying.) When she gets something in her mind, all focus and energy are given until the task or goal is achieved. As our hotel check-out time approached, we had no solid plan, nowhere to go, and no way to get there.

Sitting in the lobby, Lisa suggested that we pray for God to help us. I was thinking, "How is He gonna help us?" We need a car, and there isn't one within sixty miles. She prayed, and I closed my eyes. I was thinking "We are stuck!"

The lady at the front desk began to help us a little bit. We discovered a rental car seventy miles away in Melbourne, Florida. How would we get to Melbourne? Is this gonna cost us an arm and a leg? Quickly, Lisa found an Uber driver, and eighty-nine dollars later, we were headed eastbound to pick up our economy compact rental car. 

After a stop at Starbucks and a little bit of waiting while the Uber driver was unable to find the airport, we made it to Melbourne. Our New Year's Eve had started a little crazy, but what we didn't know is that it was going to get a bit crazier. As I walked up to the rental counter, I was thinking,  "If they don't have a car, we are in big trouble. Not only are we out the money, but we are also seventy miles away from where we need to be."

The attendant asked for my name. As I gave him my name, he said, "All I have available Mr. Cowman is a 2020 Chevrolet Camaro convertible at the same rate as the economy car -- forty-nine dollars a day."  I couldn't believe it! Not one second went by before my mind went back to Lisa's prayer. 

We couldn't get the top down soon enough! Here we are, pulling out of the Melbourne airport with a sweet ride to tour the Florida Keys. Lisa then commented about how God had heard her prayer. 

He certainly knows a lot about rental cars!

In Everything Give Thanks - Even with Covid-19?

 

I Thessalonians 5:18 is a go-to verse in the Bible to challenge us to be thankful. The verse simply says, "In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus." Usually this time of year, people make lists or do some kind of Thanksgiving count down on Facebook. It is always good to be thankful but this Thanksgiving it takes on a special meaning after being diagnosed with Covid-19. 

My usual schedule has been horribly disrupted. Our church has a large Thanksgiving celebration that I usually host. Our children all make Thanksgiving the holiday where they all come home. As you can guess that has all been canceled for us. The Bible clearly helps us see that in the midst of disappointment, we can still be thankful because it is all a part of God's plan. 

Here are five things that I am thankful for on Wednesday, November 25th, 2020.  

I am thankful that my symptoms have been mild. I have seen and heard of how this virus takes a different path for each individual. I have had friends who have lost their lives from this monster. Others are presently in the hospital on ventilators. Some people have struggled to get back to normal activities again and have lost their taste and smell.

This has not been my story. I have been asymptomatic for the most part. I did lose my sense of smell for a couple of days with a stuffy nose. What a blessing! I do not take this lightly. Knowing what others are experiencing, while not suffering has humbled me. It has caused me to pray. People with Covid-19 are on my mind continuously and I pray for them daily. 

I am thankful that my family's symptoms have been mild. My wife and two of my three daughters have also contracted Covid. For the most part, we have had mild symptoms and short bouts with this virus. We are all on the mend and will be able to start regular life again by week's end. Health should not be taken for granted. If you have your health, you should regularly thank God for this blessing. Sometimes we forget to do that.  

I am thankful for all my friends and family members that have reached out. I have been encouraged by all the emails and texts that I have received. Many people have expressed that they are praying for us and have offered words of encouragement. I am once again reminded that the best life a person can lived is one with friends and family. Our church is an amazing place. It is not a "one hour experience" with all the smoke and whistles but rather a community of people who mutually care for and share with one another. I would not trade these relationships for anything. 

I am thankful for all the expressions of kindness and support. We have had people drop by gift cards, homemade chicken noodle soup, fresh bakery bread, cold crisp grapes, encouraging cards, fruit baskets, specialty coffee, and Village Inn peach pie. This has made us feel special and favored. I am blown away by the love and support that our friends and family have shown to us. It is sometimes the simple things that we fail to give thanks for. Acts of kindness do not go unnoticed. This is a week where a lot of kindness will be shown. Do not forget to give thanks.

I am thankful I did not have to quarantine alone. One of the silver linings of this quarantine for me is that I have gone through it with my family. I am grateful that we have been able to be together and in the same rooms. We have taken full advantage of the opportunity. Game nights have become a nightly ritual. Playing a different game each night has fanned the flame of competition amongst the three of us. Watching tv, movies, and even documentaries have proved to knit us together. Special foods, coffee, and treats have created conversations about what sounds good next. Life is not meant to be lived alone. I am thankful that I live in a home where there is a lot of love and relationship.

Yes, I have a lot to be thankful for even with Covid-19.

Quincy, Illinois..... A Great Place to Be

 

Quincy, Illinois is a great place to live. Moving to our new home 17 years ago was frightening for our young family of six. We soon found out why it had retained the name the Gem City. I think the three things that stand out most to me are the 3 P's.

People We have been able to establish many lifelong friendships during our time here. These individuals took us in from the very beginning and have been a support to our family through each season. People from the midwest are hard-working, honest, and caring. This has given us a place to point our children to for examples to look up to.  These people are in every sector of the community, from educators to farmers, from doctors to mechanics and everything in between.

Proximity Quincy is the most well laid out community I know. My life is not spent in a car or in long lines of traffic. You can be anywhere in Quincy in ten minutes. For a person who is incredibly time conscious, I save hours a week simply by not being tied up in traffic. The city is so well laid out. It is easy to navigate, with many main arteries that connect key locations from all four directions. The forefathers even got the naming of the streets right, providing easily remembered patterns.  

Park systems Anyone who has lived in Quincy for any time, realizes that the park system is outstanding. The park district has so much to offer families and individuals. Walking trails, playgrounds, and ball fields are in abundance. Quincy has made a large investment in its infrastructure and the citizens are the benefactors.

These are just a few things that stand out to me. Quincy is a special place. I would encourage you to look at the city through the lens of gratitude. 

Black Hills and/or Bust COVID-19

I want you to consider a Blackhills vacation this year!
COVID-19 has altered every part of most of our lives even vacation. I put in for a two-week vacation back in February. We had our usual plans lined up and were looking forward to some time on the beach. As the days drew near, Lisa and I began to have second thoughts about traveling. I knew that staying in Quincy was not a good idea. Ministry has a way of creeping into everyday life when you just hang around.

 On our first day of vacation, we still did not know where we were going. We began our road trip south to St. Louis. By the time we stopped for a visit to see our son and his family, we knew we would need to change directions. Everything on the radio was shouting that the south was filling up with new COVID cases. 
After an overnight stay, We decided to head north. That decision did not disappoint! We had been following where the virus had least effected states and we felt confident that our time out west would be the wisest. 
By the time we made it to South Dakota, the plan started to unfold. Getting an out of state fishing license was one of the first priorities. Our stop at the Rapids City Cabela's offered everything we needed to have success on the lake. The representative gave great advice and the proper equipment to land some fish. 

Without any reservations, we were able to find lodging along the way each evening. We were able to visit the Badlands, Mt Rushmore, Devil's Tower (Wyoming), and explore the entire Black Hills with all the quaint towns such as Deadwood, Lead, Sturgis, Spearfish, Hot Springs, Custer, Hill City, and Keystone. 

Each town provided opportunities to sightsee, shop, and eat. There was plenty of room to navigate without exposure to COVID-19. We enjoyed time on the trails and by the shores of three impressive lakes. I was able to fish on Pactola, Sheridan, and Roubaix lakes. They offered amazing shoreline fishing with Trout, Blue Gill, and Small Mouth Bass.

The highlight of the trip was our stay at Spearfish Canyon Lodge in Savoy, South Dakota. It was a beautiful facility nestled in the mountains of the Black Hills. There were two falls within walking distance. Spearfish Falls and Roughlock falls were picturesque with plenty of photo opportunities.

The lodge also had a full-scale restaurant on property that we visited a few times and were not disappointed. This property would be great for couples and families alike. Rental of UTV'S, bikes, and fishing equipment was readily available.

I know that many are looking for someplace to go and I thought it would be helpful to make this suggestion. Beat COVID in the Black Hills this summer!

A Perfect Time for Your Church to Grow

I tend to see opportunity at the strangest times and in the weirdest ways. If you read the news or follow the commentators, you would think that we just exited anything good to happen forever. It is hard for me to swallow the gloom and doom pill. Especially, when people just sit around and talk about how bad it is and do nothing to make it better.

Here are 5 simple ways I've seen an opportunity and capitalized on it during this time. 

1. People are connecting in small group settings. Our church leadership had recently decided that we needed a robust small group ministry that would include all of our members. Our goal was to have 75% participation by the end of 2022. With Covid-19, we are now developing and implementing a full-on small group initiative for care and connection. We see this season to connect our church like never before. People are seeing the benefits and blessings of coming together to share in fellowship with one another. 

2. Our community is caring for real and felt needs. We are experiencing many real needs in and out of our fellowship. Spiritual sickness is real. Many have developed poor habits. They aren't spiritually being fed or having their families fed. We are taking every advantage to meet people where they are and create ways for them to nourish their souls. Many will slip through the cracks if not careful. We must make sure that you are attentive not only to who is showing up but those who are not.

3. Lay leaders are leading.  I believe this could be one of the greatest benefits of Covid-19. I see a tremendous opportunity for lay leaders young and old to step up in their leadership. We are now seeing more deacon care and connection than any time in the recent past. Decisions are being made with clarity and decisiveness. We have seen that urgency has prioritized ministry and decisions that were once challenging are no longer. Watching our deacons caring for their groups has been encouraging. People need to be reassured that they are cared for.  

4. We are changing what needed to be changed. It has been interesting to see how people navigate change. Some people are paralyzed by it, while others thrive when it happens. One thing that I have learned through Covid-19 is that we were headed in the right direction..... just at the wrong pace. Most change can happen quickly, but the thing that slows it down is the mental, emotional state of those experiencing the change. Our church has embraced the changes and we are creating new ministry initiatives daily. 

5. Focus on reaching out. We have initiated ways for our people to reach out to others. We have created a prayer network that ladies sign up for on an hourly basis. We are sharing sermons and devotional through watch parties, going on prayer walks, and creating care packages. This is just a few of the things we are implementing. 

 

The key is that people engage with other people. 
 

5 Must do's in light of Covid 19

By now most people have adapted to the new normals of COVID 19. I am presently finishing my third plastic model kit and starting my third book. Every project that I set out to do at the beginning of the year is complete. Many of my friends have sorted, organized and downsized every storage area they have. We all are finding ways to fill time, but are we taking advantage of this opportunity to make some major adjustments in our lives? Here are five must-dos as life goes back into full swing.

1. Tighten up your Finances 
Dave Ramsey was right! Many people have argued with his basic premise and financial advice. Those that agree with him often find themselves living much different then what he prescribed. Did you have six months of expenses saved up before COVID 19? Are you in debt? Did you feel the pressure of this crisis? I suggest that you curtail spending and begin a rigorous savings plan so that you are prepared for the next crisis that comes your way. Our family has been able to cut expenses significantly simply by eating all our meals from home. Make a plan and then work the plan.

2. Make wise use of your Time 
You have the same amount of time that you had before this crisis. Now you have the opportunity to use those minutes, hours and days in a much more meaningful way. I have noticed all the time that I used before the crisis on things that simply don't matter and have no redeeming value. A person would probably think that more time is given to entertainment media and social media during a pandemic. I have found the opposite to be true. My life is becoming much richer by using time for activities that are far more beneficial. Reading, thinking, and learning new things during the crisis have inspired me to use the time I have been given for God's glory. I have always found that living my life beats watching someone live theirs. Live all the minutes of your life.

3. Strengthen close Relationships 
My children are around the house again. They are all young adults but due to the Coronavirus, they are back in the nest. We have had a wonderful time bonding. Playing games, eating special meals, making videos and doing projects. Having our children back home again has given Lisa and I a new appreciation for the closeness we experience as a family. If you are not reminded of the fact that the most important people in your life are right in front of you, then now is the time to start leaning into those relationships. Don't replace busyness for the family time ever again.

4. Reestablish your Priorities
The things that mean the most tend to show up the most during difficult days. Think of all the things that were priorities two months ago that now that barely make any conversation. Entertainment, in general, has been way oversold. It makes a few people rich and keeps a lot of people poor. Sports are enjoyable to watch, but I cannot get all the hours back that I have wasted watching marginal, insignificant athletic contests that do not compete with the stated-above experiences. Travel, I love to travel, but even travel is taking on a new reality for me. Life is short and precious. Make the most of your top priorities. Do the most important thing first and if you have time for a concert, game, or adventure then by all means enjoy!

5. Embrace the Change 
Embrace the change. The world will never be like it was after this life-altering crisis. You will see hundreds of ways that your life will be different. Don't get caught up in the shock of change; but rather, embrace the parts that can make your life more meaningful and rich. There will be new opportunities to learn and grow both at home and in the workplace.